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A sort of road rage incident. I was bicycling along and noticed a concealed entrance ahead, and heard a tractor possibly about to emerge from it, so I veered slightly towards the centre of the lane. A Volkswagen Touran, painted a nice plummy colour, beeped angrily as it overtook me, and I responded reflexively, instinctively, with a hand gesture – I’m sorry but loud aggressive noises just freak me out like that. Further ahead, the honker returned the gesture, and I shouted “SORRY MATE”, and getting weirder and unintentionally less sincere-sounding “HAVE A NICE DAY” and “YOU’RE A LOVELY MAN I’M SURE”, and made a friendly thumbs-up (which might have looked like an angry clenched fist). His parting words were “YOU’RE A SHIT-ARSE”, which is quite funny … perhaps he later wished he’d thought of a better insult, but shit-arse has a certain appeal, and, if you think about it, aren’t we all shit-arses? (Unless we have certain bowel problems, which are nothing to be ashamed of.)
The most annoying thing is how that has lived rent-free in my head, replaying, for the following few days. It’s boring. Let it go!
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Was a bit disappointed in the performance of the new washing machine – taking much longer than promised to finish a cycle, and sometimes giving up and displaying the “no water” symbol (a crossed-out drawing of a tap) despite a clear abundance of water. I found I could “fix” it by taking some clothes out, but if I’d really over-filled the machine I’d expect to see the “too full” symbol. Well, turns out the lads from AO.com made a mistake – they inserted the drain hose too far into the waste pipe, which, as we all know, can cause water siphonage. (You ought to have a basic grasp of physics if you’re working for AO.com.) I gave the hose a yank and haven’t had any more problems, but it will be a while before each wash isn’t fraught with tension and I’m confident that it’s definitely solved the problem.
(The last machine’s drain hose was designed so you couldn’t insert it too far, a feature I think of most drain hoses, so it’s really Arçelik’s fault for cheaping out on the cheapest hose possible.)
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Paul Foot (h).